here is part 1 of a short story i banged together a while ago with a trek type feel to it,,,,,
Captain Peter Vander-Zant – commanding office, FM radio DJ
Major Class 2 Mill Brasco – 1st officer, Martian native / flight control / chief pilot / motorbike racer
Lieutenant Bornus Dorn – chief of security / weapons systems,
Rugby league player, thalagonian warrior
1st Lieutenant Laclista Dorn – Tactician commander / spatial & astral logistics, mate of chief Dorn
Chief engineer Phal Dan-Ark- engineering/science commander / shuttle pilot, RAAF pilot, Barcasian male
Major class 1 Nathan Zubar – battle specialist / DEA agent
Dr Bernard Dan – chief medical officer, NSW Ambulance Service paramedic, class 9 android
Jillian Vander – wife of captain, native 2k terran/ marine bioligist
Ensign X’a xorlan –stellar botanist / Dalzorian male, telepath / gardener botanical gardens Sydney
Ensign Gilbert Lee – terran / history teacher / controller relocation chamber / scanner operations / pilot
Colonel Thomas Myers (retired) – Jillian’s father, Korean War hero
Bok Telac Zor – Zantorian attack commander / Captain of the
battle-hawk KILLGARA 2
Tor Balzarius Goc – chief Assassin for the house of Zor / weapons master / 2 I-C KILLGARA 2
Star year 2465: Alpha Quadrant : 1 light year from the planet Terra 3
(formerly known as Saturn)
Battle Bridge : United Galactic Confederation Proton Class Galactic Cruiser-
STAR BLAZER – Captain Peter Van Der-Zant in command.
The STAR BLAZER had been in pursuit of a zantorian battle hawk for the last 30 minutes, this particular battle hawk, the KILLGARA 2, had just taken out a UGC recreation centre on Terra 3’s surface, killing over 1500 vacationing UGC battle ready crew and destroying 5 of the best cruisers in the fleet.
“Ltn., Dorn where have those zanto scum gone?” asked the captain, his Thalagonian security chief answered in his usual half growl “ Sir they appeared to have generated enough energy to refract their craft, but I shall continue scanning for them” The captain was getting thoroughly annoyed at these bastards, this war had been going on for close to 2 years, and it had started over nothing, just like every other conflict with the Zanto's, the console on the command chair lit up, Pete hit a button that activated the holo-screen, the face of Admiral Wallace appeared, “Captain how is the pursuit coming, caught those sneaky Zanto’s ?” enquired the senior officer. “Sir, we at this point seem to have lost them, but we shall continue the pursuit” just then the familiar but slightly more feminine growl of Bornus Dorn’s mate and the chief of spacial logistics rang out over the ships communication system “ Sir we have identified a spacial anomaly 400,000 kilometres off the starboard bow, it appears to have its own gravitational field” “ Lacy is it going to be any trouble to us?” asked the captain, “ Sir I would suggest backing away from it till I can assess any possible threat” “Lacy, put the damn thing on screen, give me a look at it?” commanded the captain getting slightly more pissed over the sequence of events since waking this morning. “Ai, sir on screen”. Pete did a double take as what looked to be a galactic tornado appeared on screen, he had seen tornado’s that use to affect earth on history discs, and he had seen wormholes in his travels through space, but this was the big angry mutant offspring of both, holy shit he thought, which was the last thing he thought as the danger sirens went off and the announcement that the anomaly had grabbed them in its gravitational field. “Mr Brasco full reverse” he yelled at his 2 I-C, but this proved extremely pointless as the 400,000 kilometres started melting away at a fast rate of knots, the last thing the captain ordered before they got sucked into this freak of galactic physics was for everybody to batten down and hang on. The trip through the tornado took only about 25 seconds but it seemed like an easy eternity to most everyone on board, the ship began to stop rolling and rocking and then they were out in normal space again, “Captain, is that Terra 1?” said Gil Lee as he regained his footing “It would appear so Ensign Lee, but I don’t know what all that space junk is trapped in orbit” answered the equally surprised captain. At this point the token Barcasian entered the battle bridge, his name, Phal Dan-Ark and he was your average human super computer, as was his species particular genetic bonus, “Captain, you are not going to accept what I have to say, because quite frankly even I don’t think it possible, although with enough spacial computation…” “Phal shut up and tell me what I don’t believe” “Ai sir, as you can see we are somehow in orbit around terra 1, the strange part is that it is not terra 1, it is earth, year 1998, month of April” this stunned not only the captain but everyone else “not possible” said Mil Brasco “very possible sir said Phal, as we exited the anomaly, my comms. Picked up a.a… oh yes a new’s report which clearly stated the date and the rest was just common sense.” “Scan for the anomaly lets get back in the thing and get out of here” “anomaly has vanished Sir,” said Ensign Lee
Vanished. . Marvellous thought the captain, “opinions Mr Brasco” “ well captain, just to be on the safe side, an idea would be to cloak up and head into the planets orbit at least until we can figure out what that thing was and how the hell we can get to it, open it and head to the 25 century” after a few more minutes discussion involving Phal Dan-Ark, Brasco, Zubar and the class 9 android chief medical officer Dr Bernard Dan, the STAR-BLAZER headed into orbit and hid itself by bending light around itself. Of course they had to do a fair bit of side stepping due to the large amount of crap that was floating around outside, the consensus on board was that the native terrans were messy individuals, with no respect for the big black, until the history buff Ensign Lee reminded everyone that this was only the beginning of long distance space travel for these people and they would clean up their act, so to speak within the next 150 years.
SIX MONTHS LATER: October 1998- STAR-BLAZER MEETING SUITE
The senior staff had gathered in the meeting suite on deck 9, the rest of the crew watching on the ship wide communication system vid screens, for the most part they had been trying to find the time twister as it had been named, but the search appeared to be fruitless, so for all intents and purposes the crew are trapped in the late 20th century, so the captain had asked the doctor and Phal to come up with some activities for the crew, because quite frankly the zantorian armada weren’t due for about 465 years and that battle was going to occur roughly 3 light hours away and apart from the odd emergency situation, like sealing an erupting volcano with a phasic torpedo, the crew didn’t have a whole lot to do now that the ship was back to battle ready status, and a very non 25th century phenomena had begun to occur with frightening regularity, the crew had started to argue amongst themselves over some very petty shit, at least according to Nathan Zubar, who apart from having an innate talent for using colourful 20th century language, was not known for pulling his punches when opinions were being sought.
Although the crew had not been sitting around after repairs and their clandestine assistance was completed, the doctor and Phal took it upon themselves to study extinct species which is how they ended up with a pair of pacific bottle nosed dolphins on board, also the doctor had been studying dermal reconfiguration, through boredom mostly, so he could alter his artificial appearance for certain celebrations of the alien crew members home worlds as he thought this would be a nice thing to do, until he realised that it would work on all species aboard. The captain looked at the doc “so what your saying is you can rebuild faces, very interesting Bern, very interesting indeed.” “ Not just faces sir, but bodies, height, weight, colour, although at this stage the transformations hold for only a 24 hour period, if I may offer an example sir” the captain nodded his approval, and two crew members entered the suite, the first was 6’5” fair skin, brown haired, blue eyed male of a solid build, the second appeared to be in the mid five foot range with blond hair and a beard, of slight build. “ Captain May I introduce you to Bornus Dorn, nodding towards the larger of the two and X’a xorlan the smaller of the pair.” “You have got to be kidding,” said the captain he was amazed because Bornus was normally over 7 feet tall with dark brown skin and a large bony ridge running down the centre of his head and X’a was truly a miracle, he usually had 3 eyes, antennae and skin colour resembling turquoise.
The captain was still stunned when Phal Dan Ark spoke, “ Also sir, I have been investigating this time period, with the help of Ensign Lee, and after a minor reconfiguration of the ships computer system, I’m able to insert false records of existence and employment into databases on the planets surface, thus, people with appropriate skills can be sent dirt side to take up various forms of employment, if anyone on board is interested, consult your historical databases and we shall see if we can assist you with your requests.” The captain was amazed and confirmed all attempts to relieve boredom as a resounding success, he even had an idea for a job for himself.
3 WEEKS LATER:
A good percentage of the crew had taken the Barcasian up on his offer, many were preparing to venture dirt side to inter mingle with the current breed of earthling, they had all undertaken familiarisation courses so that they spoke in the native dialect of whatever continent and city they would be in, and they had taken a UGC oath not to reveal their origins to anyone they became acquainted with, no matter what.
Even the captain had gone dirt side, which amazed the doctor, what was even more amazing was his selection of job, seeing as how he was an excellent pilot, diplomat and unarmed combat specialist, he had chosen to undertake the position of something called a disc jockey at a radio station in the main city of the middle state on the east coast of the main land Australian continent, Sydney was its name, the doc wondered just who the hell Sydney was as he had checked the database and could find no reference to a person named Sydney discovering this location, apparently the captain had a history bug much like Ensign lee, in particular the rather noisy form of music called hard rock, interested him, and this was his chance to go a bit crazy, so he was inserted into the database of AAA-FM the most popular station, as the new DJ from coming from Western Australia, technically true, he was born in West-OZ a small suburb in the mega city of Pacifica, although he had spent a vast amount of time on Mars, when his father had been transferred by the UGC to design the new proton class galactic cruiser. So the captain had boned up on his colourful metaphors that were in popular use, and began his hobby/career at the station, playing tunes with names like PARANOID, ROCK ’N ’ROLL ALL NITE and I’M SO BAD BABY I DON’T CARE, the doc thought these names peculiar, after all why would anyone name a tune after a long cured mental state, an apparent way to spend an evening and an obvious ego based statement, also the captain had a section on his show where terrans contacted him and discussed alien inter-action, Doc also found this strange as the first alien contact would not happen till star year 2127, up until then the so called alien visitations were conducted by the black ops security force working out of Roswell New Mexico, although a damaged Percurian craft had crashed at this location in July 1947 that was a one off occurrence as the craft had been 3000 light years off course and rumour had it that the Percurian’s couldn’t fly south for the winter successfully let alone pilot a star craft.
The doc suspected some of these terrans contacting the captain had been imbibing too much in the plant species known as cannabis hashish, and watching too much television, a truly peculiar way to spend ones life he thought to himself, some other crew had equally interesting jobs, for instance Mr Dorn was a professional sportsman, playing a rather barbaric version of Grav ball called rugby league, Mr Lee was a history professor at Sydney University and X’a was a gardener at the Botanic gardens, a strange name, was there another kind of garden? Thought the doc, Mr Brasco was a motorcycle racer and Mr Zubar was a law enforcement officer with the D.E.A in America, and Phal Dan-Ark had undertaken a position with the RAAF as a fighter pilot, apparently he felt like doing something slightly more physical than studying in his off hours. The doc reached for a control panel and activated the captains radio show, he was talking to a terran female about the communication system employed by dolphins, a difficult sonic system involving mathematical sequencing, one day the dolphins might start using their innate telepathic abilities again and explain this to the terrans, but the doc doubted it, after all the dolphins had most of the planet trained now and why spoil a good thing.
2 MONTHS LATER:
The marine biologist the captain had interviewed on the show had become Pete’s new mate and they had obtained residence in a Sydney suburb, in one month all senior bridge crew were invited to the nuptials of the new couple, the doc was looking forward to this as he was trying to increase his knowledge of human social behaviour, and humans of this period were as good as any to practice on.
THE WEDDING: JANUARY 1999
As expected the day went off without a hitch, although Mr Dorn had to be restrained from eating the preist on a couple of occasions when he did not agree with the wedding vows the preist was intimating to the happy couple, and X’a was asked not to put silly answers into the head of either the Captain or Jillian, as the Dalzorian like a good practical joke as much as the next species, Mr Lee spent a good part of the night talking with the entire guest list as he loved talking about occurrence’s that had happened during this time frame, as for our Barcasian friend Phal , he sat at his table with what appeared to be large sunglasses on, actually it was his portable historical database, as at Barcasian celebrations the guests all sit around and speed read whole volumes of Barcasian methodology, and he could no reason to change that way of doing things now. The Doc had a fine time, he even imbibed some alcohol, 5 cartons of draught beer and 4 bottles of Bourbon to be exact, it had no effect but he thought he should try it anyway. The happy couple then went on a holiday for two weeks, as was the custom, Mr Dorn suggested to the captain that the casino on the moon was a fine place, the captain reminded the Thalagonian that there was no casino on the moon yet and Jillian’s head would explode due to the lack of atmosphere when they beamed to the surface, so they went to a place called Surfers Paradise in the state of Queensland, while they were away, some of the crew beamed into the couples house and deposited some gifts and performed some minor cosmetic adjustments, the captain told his wife that decorators would be at the house while they were away, well they weren’t decorators , there was however two Martian’s, a Dalzorian, and two members of the species, the Cromlech’s, whose grasp of the aesthetic was amazing and they did a fine job, they must have because Jill was very impressed upon their return from honeymoon.
Jillian was also impressed with some of the furniture saying how new it looked considering Pete had said it was old, well it would be old in about 468 years, but what the hell, occasionally Jill would find a strange piece of apparatus laying around the house, Pete always explained the gizmo’s is away in a totally plausible manner, the doc surmised that he subconsciously wanted to tell Jill his origins, Pete told the doc he was full of shit, now that stumped the ships favourite artificial life form beyond belief, but then again the colourful language some of the crew had adopted usually threw the doc a curve ball anyway.
Time to rock ’n’ roll Sydney
Time 7:00 pm-year 2000. Earth…Sydney Australia, TripleA FM radio station
“And that’s it for another drive time slice of rock and aliens, hear you lot tomorrow”…. Jesus, if these people only knew how far off base they actually are”, Pete Vander thought to himself as he finished his top rating afternoon rock music and alien/ufo talkback show, “seeya on the morrow” he says to his boss and booth tech Stan, “Yeh seeya Pete, coming for a drink later?” Stan asks, “No mate got something on, catchya.” Pete smiled to himself as he entered the elevator to go to the staff car park; he smiled even wider as he touched the cleverly camouflaged communicator on his right wrist ”must compliment chief engineer Dan-Ark on these new comms, very nifty”. The elevator opened in the car park, three people entered, but no one exited, mainly because that the physical entity known to his co-workers as Pete Vander had to put it bluntly, been broken down to a light source and been transposed to the flight deck of his command. The United Galactic Confederation, Proton Class Galactic Cruiser. The UGC STAR-BLAZER-PGC 1962.
“Captain Vander-Zant, welcome aboard, “thankyou Lieutenant anything to update me on?” Pete looked at his chief of security, a 7 foot 450 lb Thalagonian named Bornus Dorn, “no sir, nothing major although Dan-Ark thinks he may have found the reason for our most recent failure to escape this antiquated time period, “Ltn, If I’ve told you a once, I’ve told you a million times, as the terrans say at the station, CHILL OUT! And besides its not as if you’re trapped on the ship now is it?
“No captain” replied the thalagonian “ by the way Mr Dorn, how is the football season coming along?” “Very well thankyou sir, we are what’s known as kicking arse, according to the frail little earthlings I play with at the “Rhino’s”.
The captain smiled to himself “my chief of security has more combined mass than all his team mates put together, I’m surprised he hasn’t terminated a few of these fragile little footballers, thank the UGC for his internal grav-control.
Pete entered the jet lift and punched in the location for engineering, 4.2 seconds later, which is amazing, considering it would have taken the best part of a 24 hrs to manually walk to engineering, he exited from the lift into the main work area, the soothing hum of the atomic-core combined with the chatter of his engineering staff, combining some 7 species of the UGC, made him slightly forget about all he heard today, the alien abductions and implanted probe’s YUK…”these 20th century terrans have a vivid imagination that’s for sure”
ENGINEERING: “Phal, Ltn.Dorn tells me you have a answer to our most recent failure?”
“Ai captain that I do” answered the gold skinned red-eyed mature barcasian male and RAAF fighter pilot, Phal Dan-Ark, mature being 450 earth years, this explains the super intelligence the barcasian are blessed with thought the captain, 300 years of university is bound to make anyone smarter.
“Proceed with the illuminating explanation if you will Mr Dan-Ark” “one simple word captain, pollution, to be more specific, a leaking fuel compartment of a antiquated space vehicle belonging to the former USSR, the radiation seems to be affecting the opening of the wormhole which we came through, this explains our chronal stasis at this time” “anything you can do about the situation Phal?” enquired the captain “apart from flat out destroying it with a burst from the ‘blazers’ cannons, nothing can be done at this time, captain.”
“So destroy it, although I have much to be pleased with in our two years here, I would much rather be back in 2465, having a nice little battle with the zantorians” the captain said. “Pete, not afraid of being spotted by the planetary space control?” enquired his chief engineer,“ Two things Phal #1 we are cloaked and #2 with the less than UGC approved equipment our predecessors use, they will probably think it was a meteor strike” said the captain…”ohh one more thing Phal” “what’s that captain” enquired the barcassian, “the planetary space control is still 285 years from being formed” the captain winked, slapped his old crewmate on the back, “formulate a plan for fixing our little problem and get back to me”.
CAPTAIN, PLEASE REPORT TO TACTICS, “really must humanize that computers voice somewhat” thought Pete, he responded in the affirmative and proceeded to tactics and its commanding officer, Ltn.Laclista Dorn, mate/wife of his ever humorous chief of security, and just as big, although on Thalagon, she is considered somewhat of a, how do the terrans put it? Ahh yes a babe, 6’10” 325lbs of compressed muscle and spunk, unlike her husband who actually waits 20 seconds before punching someone, Laci would be considered more impulsive.
DECK 10, TACTICS & LOGISTICS announced the computer; Pete exited the lift into a circular room with a giant holographic map of UGC space floating serenely in the centre, although since the UGC is still 300 years from forming, Pete wondered why the thing was even activated. Must keep Lacy occupied, I guess, god knows what damage a bored Thalagonian would do, especially since she wont go dirt side and partake of the delights of ancient history, must be the cosmetic surgery she doesn’t like, Thalagonian females are somewhat vain after all.
“Ltn. You requested my presence?” Said the Captain “ that I did sir” replied the best tactician in all the UGC “ the monitoring system I launched into the vortex has detected some strange readings!” “Proceed with your report” “thankyou sir, it has come to my attention that someone or something is attempting to perform a chronal leap” “really Ltn. Any indications as to what or who” asked the captain slightly amazed that a species had re-created the accident that sent them to this time period “ no sir” said laci, “we can only hope that if they succeed, it will be someone who isn’t on a mission of conquest.” “Agreed Ltn. keep me appraised of the situation and inform Chief engineer Dan-Ark of your findings.” ‘Ai sir will comply” stated the gigantic blond with the meanest right cross since the ancient battler Mike Tyson was at his peak. “Ahh.Ltn. One quick question?” “Yes sir” “any further thought to going dirt side and having some cultural immersion?” “I believe I have stated my intentions sir, while Bornus apparently enjoys that primitive version of thalogonian tackle ball, and the constant dermal upgrades so his team-mates don’t run screaming in terror, I have no such desires to mix with those fragile little terrans.” “ But Ltn. Am I not a fragile little terran?” Asked the captain “ sir you know as well as I do, due to evolution, you are 3 times stronger, faster and smarter than your ancestors, and your lifespan has been extended 3 fold unlike your terran wife, who will not outlive you by a long shot!” realising her statement was completely out of order she bowed her head and apologised. “ Quite alright Ltn. You know as well as I do that I have always required complete honesty among my chiefs of staff” “thankyou sir, I shall learn to watch my mouth in the future” “keep me informed of the situation Ltn. Carry on” said Pete. Well since I’ve got time I might as well go see the doc, see if he needs anything, thought Pete as he ventured to deck 5, the medical suites location to see probably his favorite crew staffer, Dr Bernard Dan, medical chief, class 9 android and all round top fellow.
That finding has got me bugged thought the captain, someone jumping time, fingers crossed, that its explorers from the distant, but somehow I doubt it. “Computer. Medical if you would be so kind” the jet lift fired up and the captain went on his way with his mind still troubled.
Chapter 2 the wonders of medicine
Location: Medical suites -deck 5
DECK 5 MEDICAL: Captain Vander-Zant exited the lift and entered the chief medical officers suite, upon entering he saw the good doctor performing the now common dermal upgrade on a member of the bridge staff, a Dalzorian, blue skin, 3 eyes and a telepath to boot, “Ensign X’a xorlan, how is your dirt side off hours coming along” enquired the captain “ very fruitful captain” replied the blue skinned chief botanist of the Sydney City Council botanical Gardens “ I have just finished synthesising a new source of vegetable matter that will eliminate hunger” smiled the ever helpful dalzorian “negative Ensign, you know the rules regarding interference on a global scale” said the captain “ dispose of it upon your return dirt side, OK” “ yes sir, shall do, I meant no harm sir” “I know that X’ , still and all, a sterling achievement, well done.” The young ensign smiled broadly and a tear formed in that rather pleasant green eye in the middle of his soon to be human toned forehead.
“Carry on Ensign” said the captain. “Yes sir, thankyou sir” then a telepathic flash rammed into his head <sir, flowers to the wife as usual> the captain nodded his approval as the ensign entered the dermal upgrade chamber that would solidify his cosmetic alterations for 24 terran hours.
“Barn, how are you travelling old friend” enquired the captain “ bi-pedally usually captain” replied the class 9 android and then realising his attempt at spontaneous humour worked he spontaneously smiled as well. “ Sir you require no cosmetics, so what brings you down to med” “just a visit to see you” replied the cap “also since you’re the one who created this form of entertainment for the crew, just wanted to check up how its going” “well sir, there is no problems, all the crew show no side effects to the regular procedures although that security chief needs a good kick in the scrotals sometimes, complaining about the procedure all the time, he knows full well that he cannot go dirt side in his usual appearance, its hard enough making him a shade over 6’ without him stating the obvious” “the obvious?” enquired the captain “ yes sir” said the doc “and I quote, I DO NOT HAVE THE APPEARANCE OF A THALAGONIAN WARRIOR , THIS DISRESPECTS MY ANCESTORS” “ahh I see well I shall have to have a word to Mr smiley then wont I “ said captain vander-zant “ also captain might I enquire as to my availability on board on a 24 hour basis?” the android enquired. “ Well your only required for your duty shifts Barn, Why?” asked Pete “sir, if I may be so forward, I have used the comp-sys to create myself a dirt side life, if that’s all right?” “Certainly old friend, what type of life have you created?” “Well sir as we have not been in battle for 2 years, 8 weeks and 17 hours, my triage skills were getting stale, so I created a position with the NSW ambulance service as a paramedic, some form of ancient mobile physician, I’ve up loaded all required info and start my first shift when you give the O.K.” “By all means doc, as we say at the radio station, knock yourself out” “knock myself out?” said the doc”why… he was cut off by the captain “a verbal expression Doctor an expression is all” Ohh very good sir, will that be all?” “Yes, it will my good doctor, I am going dirt side and having dinner with my wife” “ have a fine evening sir and don’t forget to glance skyward at approximately 9:45 pm for the arrival of the comet known as haldons” “ thankyou barn, but haldon’s comet hasn’t been discovered yet” it always made Pete smile when he got one of his crew making a time zone error, especially the android who wasn’t supposed to make errors.
Time to go dirt side thought Pete, speaking into his comm. He requested the relocation lounge to prepare for his imminent departure and to get his work owned BMW motor vehicle transported around the corner from his planet side abode he shared with his wife of 14 months, Jilly, a native 20th century terran, great girl, if she only knew, the captain smiled, shut of his com and entered the jet lift.
DECK 2: RELOCATION LOUNGE:
“ Ensign, relocater ready? ” enquired the captain “yes captain, your vehicle has also been transported to the standard co-ordinates, umm captain” enquired Ensign Gil Lee, the second biggest ancient history freak other than the captain on the ship “yes ensign?” “Sir as it relates to your vehicle, I was thinking that you should have engineering increase the odometer’ “and why would that be ensign? “ asked the curious captain “well sir, you have reportedly been driving it in a 60 kilometre round trip every day for 21 terran months, correct?” “Yes your point” the odometer has only 91 klm’s on the clock, it should be up around 12,600 k mark”
After a couple of quick mental calculations he looked at Gill “Damn Gil you’re right, do me a favour, next time I come aboard relocate the vehicle as well” “Yes sir” answered the ensign “oh and Gil, keep thinking like that and your gonna go home a admiral” the captain winked, smiled and stepped aboard the relocater pad, thanks to the technology the clothing he came aboard in replaced his uniform as he stepped aboard the pad.
“Ready to relocate” “proceed Mr lee, seeya dirt side, history museum Saturday” “Ai captain, good trip.” As the captain vanished, Gill thought to himself go home an admiral huh? Nice sentiment, but I doubt we will ever get home, and besides if I made admiral that would mean the captain made omnipotent being. Considering its would be about 150 years before his branch of the family tree sprouted, gill was quite content to hang around and absorb some ancient culture, and he would do anything to protect it, seeing as how the Harbour Bridge or the Sydney space arch, for it was where visiting space shuttles docked, was still in use,
Gill would be happy with spotting a Battle hawk and blasting it down to its base elements. Yeah, that would do nicely.
CHAPTER 3: DIRT SIDE WITH THE FAMILY
Around the corner from 61 Pearl Street Newtown Sydney
A shimmering shower of turquoise spheres appear next to the AAA-FM owned BMW321I, Pete Vander’s form transports into the beam, he steps out, opens the door on his car and drives it approx 45 yards into the driveway of his one up, one down $875,000 townhouse, Pete thought to himself 50 years ago this area was slums, now they charge 7 times the normal housing rate to live here, I can hardly wait for money to be abolished, even if its 200 years from now. The little woman, as Pete calls his wife met him at the door of Casa del Vander, one big hug and kiss later he was comfortably sat in a fairly huge leather lounge, little did Jilly now that this particular lounge was crafted from the hide of a thalgonian drack beast and was about 7 light years and 465 years from its birth place. Two glasses of beer duly arrive, Pete takes a sip, “so Jils how was all your fishy little mates today?” he enquired knowing full well that his beloved, marine biologist wife worked with dolphins not fish, “ I wont even answer that on principal” jilly answered “how were all your loopy little alien loving listeners?” I cant believe I married a complete cynic thought Pete, one day she is gonna get the shock of her life…”By the way, dads coming for the weekend” said Jill’s as she went to refill the glasses, “he is really looking forward to seeing those so-called alien artefacts at the museum”.
Brilliant thought Pete, and smiled to him self, one of the few 2k terrans who can relate to a battle situation, even though he did have a grandfather at home who could blue with the best of them, ah yes the man who raised him after a zantorian bomb had flattened New Brisbane University and killed along with his parents 15,000 other students and staff, going to have some beers and listen to some war stories. Pete smiled to himself, if the colonel only knew that the Korean general he let escape back in ‘56 would be the blood ancestor of the terrorist that formed an alliance with the Zantorian high commission that as good as started this little tête-à-tête that has consumed half the known galaxy in battle, “ Alright, your dad is always good for some laughs, oh by the way I invited Gill, that OK?” “Yen of course it is, gill is a really nice guy bit obsessed with modern history but everyone needs a hobby” Jilly answered, modern history my bum smiled Pete to himself, “Oh by the way, thanks for the flowers lover, but I’ve never seen transparent carnations before, which shop sells them?” Jilly said.
Good god thought Pete, bloody X’a, when’s he going to stop mutating flowers and sending the results here before his boss finds them, “not a prob, hon, not a prob at all” Pete said.
The mobile phone sitting on the coffee table started buzzing and vibrating around the table, Pete answered it. “Pete here, its your two bob start talking” “Captain, its Brasco, to use the current vernacular, you best get your arse topside we got some weird readings coming in”
Mil Brusco a native Martian who was first officer aboard the ship had been to Europe for a week to the 500 GP cycle races in Assen Holland, quite a nice guy, a top officer, a bit green around the tissue, but you cant have everything, thought Pete “ really Mil, ya mean the owner of the radio station wants me now? Yeh righto on me way, you know what to do” Pete called out to Jilly, “gotta step over to the station for a bit, the owner wants a meeting with all DJ’s” “OK Pete, try not to be too long, I’m putting the steaks on now, seeya soon” Pete closed the front door behind him jumped in the car turned the key, turned the key again and got out of the car 22,500 k’s above his house, “Mr Lee fix that odometer for us will you, where’s
1st officer brasco?” “ With Phal Dan-ark in astral science sir, and consider the car upgraded” Ensign Lee smiled at his captain, “thanks Gill get a stand by and join us in AS will you” “ai captain will do”.
Chapter 4: what are those pricks doing here?
DECK 7: ASTRAL SCIENCE
“Report, Mr Brasco” said the captain as he and Ensign Lee, entered the astral science suite, “sir we have readings that suggest a vessel with controlled particle capability is within one light year.” “Mr Dan-Ark, suggestions?” asked the captain to his chief engineer “Sir, given the time period, and assuming the scanners aren’t picking up our signature bouncing off the debris that the 2k’ers have left scattered about indiscriminately, I can offer no reasonable theory” “Hmmm it doesn’t make sense, although my gut feelings say, no, screams TROUBLE” stated the captain. “Captain, all my training tells me to gear up for a skirmish” said Mill.
“Agreed Mr Brasco, Captain to flight deck, Mr Dorn battle status till further notice.”
“Battle status confirmed captain” said the security chief “TACTICS to captain vander-zant” Ltn Dorn sounded even more pissed off than usual “yes laci” said Pete “captain, a Zantorian battle hawk has just jumped out of CP above the Hawaiian Islands” “your kidding, what are those maniacs doing here” asked Brasco to no one in particular, “to use the current verbiage gentleman, time to kick some zanto arse, gents lets away to the flight deck” said the captain.
“CAPTAIN ON DECK” barked the 7 foot security chief, “we have some visitors Mr Dorn” “Ai sir, the Ltn. has already informed me, by the way sir all crew dirt side have been recalled to battle status” “Very good Ltn.” “Incoming message sir, zantorian in origin” said the ensign at comm. “very good, picture it” said the captain, a 15 x 15 holo-screen lit up and the rather arrogant visage of Bok Telac Zor glimmered into view
“Well, well, well captain wanderlust, how pleasant to stare through you once again” smirked the leader of the zantorian attack command. “First of all, Its vander-zant and second of all you have never been pleasant about anything in your whole conceited existence Telac, but pleasantries aside, what are you doing in this time period?” said the captain.
“If you really must know, you vapid sub-species, I simply followed your CP trail into that little spatial anomaly, admittedly arriving in this time zone is an added bonus, I was thinking we might end up at the other end of A Quad, but a whole new century, very special indeed” smirked the arrogant bastard. “ Its going to be so much fun blasting away without fear nor favour on these cavemen HAHAHAHHA” Pete’s grip on his armrests got a little firmer , “ now Telac if you start shooting I’m going to start shooting and all hell could bust loose, what say we just zap back through the wormhole you apparently fixed with your battle lust, and we carry on this back in A Quad somewhere?” enquired the captain. “I seriously doubt it wanderlust, you never know with time anomalies, as they are, if I kill enough cavemen, I may just slaughter your ancestors, wouldn’t that be special, and if they disappear, so do you, Bok Zor OUT!” The captain, slammed his hand against his Comm-panel “ Just what I don’t bloody need, wholesale bloodshed, Mill, suggestions?” “Well sir” said Ltn.Brasco “an obvious solution is blowing that slap-head right out of existence, but that would, obviously blow our cover, other than that, we could leave this time frame now that our little zanto buddy’s have apparently fixed it” “Phal, anything to add?” said the captain. The chief engineer thought momentarily “ nothing to add sir, although might I suggest that the zantorians will be monitoring us for any relocations, I suggest bringing your wife aboard as a safety precaution.” “Now that’s something I was saving for the absolute last minute, hmm”
Captain to CMO Dan, “ Yes sir, how may I assist?” enquired the android physician, the captain answered “Bern, what effects would CP speed have on a 2k terran?”
“Well sir, the obvious would be g-forces, with probable rapid aging, although I cant be certain about that, if you are referring to your wife might I suggest a static force field containing 2k artificial temporal energy, she will be able to stay alert, and the unit will be portable, so she will be able to move about the ship” “And you can construct such a field?” asked the captain “sir, as I have seen people say on the terran transmissions, I’m not just a pretty face” “that your not, proceed Doctor, I shall be in contact, captain out” the captain smiled to himself, just what I need a television addicted class 9 android. The captain addressed the crew over the comm. “if anyone has a problem with me bringing aboard my wife, speak now” mill brasco stepped forward, “Pete, a fairly stupid question if you don’t mind me saying so, you’re the only one to marry a 2k’er thus far, and besides what would you do if someone stated a negative to your query?”
The captain looked at his long time friend “ quite honestly Mill, I would grab a disruptor transport down to the house and vaporise her, because I’m not leaving her at the mercy of Zor and his crew of maniacs.” Brasco to CMO Dan, construct the static field old friend we are going to have a visitor. Pete was relieved by his crew’s compassion, by 25-century standards they were being normal, but seeing as the location was not 2465 he would have understood a negative response to his enquiry.
“Mr Dorn, scan my residence for life signs” “Ai captain, two adult 2k’s confirmed” two, Pete wondered, “ damn, my father in law arrived early” CMO to Captain “yes doctor” “static field constructed and stable” “thankyou doctor, room for two is there?” “Ai captain” “captain to relocation prepare for my beam down and return with 2 adult 2k’s” “Gil responded, “Ai sir Jill and the Colonel I presume?” “Correct Mr Lee, be there shortly”
The captain looked over his shoulder at his security chief, who had a strange look on that head of his “ Bornus you appear confused” “sir I did not know that your mates elder was a warrior, I shall welcome him by telling tales of my battles, will he reciprocate?” wondered the thalagonian giant “ “I can confirm his joy in regaling people with tales of battle, Bornus, just let him get use to your appearance first OK” “Ai sir, shall do”
The front door to 61 Pearl Street opened, a rather serious looking Pete walked into the living room, Jilly looked at her husband “I didn’t hear the car pull up and judging by that look, something’s afoot, show cancelled maybe?” The colonel chimed in, “ yes son, you look a bit peeved, how about a beer?” Pete stared at the two people who had accepted him with the absolute minimum of info he had offered, “you are not going to believe what is about to go down.” He raised his wrist, a metallic wristband hummed into view, “Captain to Ensign Lee, proceed with the relocation, 3 to go.” Jill recognised the voice of Gill Lee as it echoed around the room, “Ai captain, commencing.”
Pete reached out and grabbed a hand of each the two confused terrans, “this wont hurt a bit guys.” Jill and the colonel watched the room turn an aqua blue and then stared stunned as Gill Lee shimmered into view and he was wearing a weird set of clothes, Jill turned and looked at her husband who somehow also had changed threads, “Welcome aboard the STAR BLAZER, Mrs Vander-Zant and also you Colonel Myers.” Gill offered as the blue light disipitated, Captain the static chamber will be ready when you give the go sign.” “Thankyou ensign, Inform the crew of the arrivals.” He assisted his stunned wife off the pads, her father being ex-army gained his balance and walked off himself, “Gill, what’s going on, where am I, what’s with the uniform, ARGGHH and who’s the blue guy with 3 eyes?” Jill bombarded the man she thought of as a history geek with a stream of babble based questions.
“Firstly Jill, I think the captain can do all the explaining and as for my blue toned offsider, you know him as Alexander Arbogrian “ Jill was stunned, reaching out to touch the now blue skinned botanist, “Alex, is that really you?” instead of the verbal response she was waiting for, X’a spoke straight into her brain, as was his custom, < yes madam, tis I, was your trip a pleasurable sensation, I’m sure it was > the sensation slightly stunned the native terran, Pete, calmly leaning against a bulkhead was smiling to himself, “Mr Lee, any sign of those zanto creeps?” “No sir, all is quiet on the galactic front.” “Mr Xorlan, the use of verbal would be appreciated, but a lovely greeting none the less.” The young ensign smiled and exited the
Re-locator suite, “Now, lets get you two settled in.” “SETTLED IN, SETTLED IN? How about explaining what the fuck is going on?” demanded his wife. “Now Jill, Peter obviously has a reasonable explanation, you do don’t you Pete?” the colonel said stepping in between the pair. “OK OK lets go to my office and I’ll explain what’s going on, as best I can.”
THE CAPTAINS PREP SUITE: adjacent to flight deck
If the sudden transition from home to ship wasn’t weird enough for the 2k’ers the short journey to the prep suite sure was, Jill kept a firm hold of her husbands arm mainly due to the fact that she, being a lifetime member of the sceptic’s society, could not imagine that most of the friends that had visited the house in Newtown were of varying hues and configurations, very few of which were human, so far they had come across 5 long time acquaintances, only one of which resembled an earthling, she had met Bornus(Barry Dunn)Dorn, Mill (mike barnes) Brusco, the blue skinned botanist X’a xorlan and her father had met a young RAAF fighter pilot he had met at an ANZAC day celebration who now had gold skin, red eyes and apparently was 450 years old (Phal Dan-Ark). Pete took a seat behind a glass sheet that apparently floated in place, offered a seat to his still stunned guests, he adjusted his collar and spoke, “ 28 months ago, this ship and its crew were in battle with a Zantorian battle hawk in A-Quad, some 15 light years other side of the planet you know as Venus, we dived into what we thought was a fairly standard wormhole, sort of like a space tornado, and after a somewhat rough ride we ended up 22,500 kilometres above the city of Sydney circa 1998.”
The colonel adopted a military air in his voice, spoke first. ”Well we can’t argue with the obvious, but why are we here now?” “Yesterday a zantorian battle hawk arrived from 2465, and I thought it best that you be brought aboard for safety reasons, because as god made little green apples, those psychopaths will start blasting away just to align the sighting mech’s on their weapons” “But Pete” Jill said “ why didn’t you tell me, us this before?”
“ Hon, you would have had me committed and besides my crew would have secured my release by blasting a big hole in the whackatarium and how would you explain that away with the curious nature of the media in this time period”
The captain smiled broadly, walked over to a panel in the wall and produced two small badges, a earth symbol with a atom symbol circling it, “these are comm.’s, if you need to or want to contact anyone on the ship tap it and state their name, or in your case their nom-de-plume and they will respond, now its time for a check-up for you guys and besides you haven’t met Dr. Bernard Dan yet.” “Nice fella is he?” asked the colonel. “Absolutely, if you like artificial life forms.” The captain smiled, the colonel’s jaw dropped and he led his question filled family to the jet lift.
MED SUITE: approx 45 mins later
“Well Doctor, the folks in good health?” Enquired the captain, “Ai sir, the elder terran had a mild case of cancer, but no major problems were evident and as for your good lady, a slight stomach ulcer and some skin parasites that should be found under water, but once again nothing major.” “Thanks Doc” said Pete; the colonel looked at his son-in-law “tell us about these zantorians, that have ruined my weekend.” Pete walked over to a illuminated wall panel “computer, all known statistics and history on Zantorians, take a seat guys” Jill thought the holographic image of a being with a Beatle haircut and weird ears was beyond belief,
COMMENCING BRIEFING stated the wall panel.
CHAPTER 5: ZANTORIAN’S- R- US
Physical appearance: average height 2 metres
Weight: 150 kilos
Olive skin, extended earlobes, and bi-pedes, IQ: average 150
Achieved controlled particle speed 2310, technically: comparable to most UGC aligned societies,
Warlike, accomplished negotiators, subterfuge specialists, overwhelming desire to overlord the UGC and its allies.
Civilisation beginning around 4 million earth years ago, class system intact until 4 decades ago when a planetary civil war engulfed the Zantorian home world until a being named Zorac Cobar joined all ruling houses into one, although this is believed to be shaky at best.
KNOWN ALLIES: none, although they are believed to have a colony in the Beta Quad with exceptional resources from raids of B Quad systems
“There you have it, minimal as it is, although let me add that all the zantorians I have had the misfortune of interacting with have been complete…suck holes” Jill smiled at her husbands use of, as the doctor called it, a colourful phrases, but she guessed if he was going to blend into society he had to learn to talk like an aussie she guessed. “So these zanthingyians have started a stink and you were or are fighting with them” asked the colonel, “correct sir, and might I add that we would appreciate any tactics that you would care to offer” said Pete “don’t be daft boy, what could I possibly offer you, what with these computers and such you have going for you” “ Frankly colonel, these arsewipes are ignorant as to earth history, so after talking with Ltn. Bonus Dorn we agreed that your knowledge of jungle warfare will be immensely valuable and it would be an honour to have you assist us, if you want to that is.” “ Well if you put it that way, how can an old war dog like me refuse, besides they appear cocky and cocky is easy to set up and shoot down in my experience” smiled the retired commando, “Excellent, Captain to Ltn. Bornus, Colonel Myers will be assisting you in battle-tact.”
“ Ai captain, a true pleasure colonel, please join me on deck 2 in battle tact, Bornus out.”
Ensign, show Colonel Myers to battle tact” Pete ordered a passing ensign. “ And what about me?” enquired the missus “ well hon how about I get X’a to show you our earth species we are studying.” “What kind of species?” “Oh, carnivores, herbivores, DOLPHINS” he watched his wife light up as he mentioned her second favourite species on the planet, besides him that is. “Oh one thing dearest, these particular bottle nosed little buggers has one decided advantage over your two friends Tommy-lee and Pamela.” “Really, what might that be?” Jill stated raising her eyebrows “ they talk, albeit mechanically, but speech has been achieved, apparently X’a and the doc got bored about 6 months in and re-arranged some base chemicals in their brains.” One quick tap of his comm. “Captain to X’a” “Ai captain” my wife wishes to be introduced to bob and hazel post haste.” “It will be my pleasure, X’a out.” Jill laughed out loud “BOB AND HAZEL! HAHAHAHA, what possessed you to name them that?”
Pete smirked and replied “ well, you named yours after a drug crazed rock musician and his pumped up Barbie girl wife.” “Touché” said Jill as X’a entered the med labs “ O.K. my telepathic 3 eyed buddy show me to your mammals” Jill said hooking the confused dalzorian’s arm and led him out of the med labs.
Chapter 6: these cave men are humorous to say the least
War deck: Zantorian battle hawk – KILLGARA 2
“HAHAHAHAHAHA excellent shooting Tor Goc” laughed Bok Zor, as he watched his second in command waste the ancient heads on Easter Island, they disappeared in a flash of yellow light, the zantorians were having, what captain vander-zant would call a yippy shoot, calmly blasting into oblivion various ancient wonders of the world, so far that morning they are set off an eruption of Mt Kilauea, vaporised the great pyramid of cheopis and just for a laugh, melted the gold depository in America named Fort Knox, quite an eventful morning, “NOW that the sighting mech’s are aligned, let us contact the assembly known as the United Nations and demand that they allow us free access to raid this miserable time frame until that grumbling macklock vander-zant decides to engage us in battle”. Bellowed the most arrogant being in the zantorian fleet, the captain of the killgara 2, Bok Telac Zor, “Goc remember the whining response we received from the bolkarians when we raided their planet.” “Yes my lord, but we decimated that miserable dust ball anyway, HAHAHAHAHA.” replied the assassin with the highest kill ratio on the zantorian home world.
Tor goc reached over and activated the view screen, and a smirk crawled its way across his face as he witnessed the complete annihilation of a large town 30 kilometres from the base of the lava spewing volcano he himself had roared into malevolent activity that very morning.
A equally obnoxious computerised voice announced that it had patched into earth based transmissions, ON SCREEN bellowed Bok Zor, this shall be most amusing thought the head of zantorian diplomacy, a title that the UGC thought to be an amusing little oxymoron.
CHANNEL 11 NEWS UPDATE:
VARIOUS WORLD FAMOUS SITES HAVE BEEN DESTROYED IN ATTACKS EMANATING FROM SPACE; THE U.S GOVERNMENT HAS CONTACTED ITS ALLIES AND ITS KNOWN ANTAGONISTS TO ESTABLISH WHO HAS BEEN FIRING NEW WEAPONS OF INCREDIBLE POWER AND ACCURACY. THE UNITED NATIONS HAVE ACTIVATED THE WORLD WIDE EMERGENCY SYSTEM JUST IN CASE THE BLASTS ARE NUCLEAR IN NATURE…FURTHER UPDATES AS THEY COME TO HAND.
“Nuclear, HAHAHAHA, these cavemen still use nuclear energy, Tor Goc, proceed to continue flattening what you consider to be a worthy targets.” “Yes my lord, I have found a rather large stone statue in a harbour in North America, a terran female apparently, permission to destroy?” “ By all means, especially since it is a female, only these cave dwellers would erect a statue to a inferior species, unlike our females who can cook, clean and kill, HAHAHAHAHA.”
“My Lord, the leader of North America is transmitting a plea,” announced the comm. officer, “ he seems to be pleading for whoever is committing these foul attacks to cease and desist”
Bok Zor stroked his chin, “ well isn’t that interesting, a so called super power leader crying like a barclavian sol beast, from where is the message coming.” “ A anti nuclear bunker under a large white building in the metropolis called Washington D.C” “ Tor Goc, shut this whining clak zar up, destroy the bunker.” “Yes My Lord,” answered the 2 I-C, as he lined up the white house and promptly let loose with a barrage of nuetronic missiles, one would have been sufficient, why shoot one when you have a whole clip to let loose.
“My Lord we have located the nation where the captain of the STAR BLAZER was sequestered.” Stated a low rank officer, “ Excellent, eliminate whatever targets you so desire, proceed.” Bok Zor had a hard time removing the arrogant smirk off his head. Tor Goc calmly aligned the Australian continent up, powered up any and all of the weapons systems, logged into the tourism website and hit the fire button.
Chapter 7: I’m sick of these zantorian arseholes
NEWS FLASH: ADDRESS TO THE NATION FROM THE PRIME MINISTER, JOHN HOWARD. “ MY FELLOW AUSTRALIANS, AS OF 10:30 AM THIS MORNING, OUR NATION HAS BEEN ON THE RECEIVING END OF THE MYSTERIOUS ENERGY BLASTS THAT HAVE HAD DEVASTATING EFFECTS ON BOTH EUROPE AND THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES, THUS FAR WE HAVE LOST THE OPERA HOUSE, ULAHRU, CENTRE POINT TOWER, THE S.C.G AND THE OLD PARLIAMENT HOUSE, OUR ARMED SERVICES VARIOUS BASES AROUND THIS NATION HAVE BEEN OBLITERATED, I BEG YOU ALL TO TAKE WHATEVER PRECAUTIONS YOU DEEM NECESSARY AT THIS TIME…
The nations TVs erupted into snow, then this message…
IT HAS COME TO THE ATTENTION OF THIS NEWS SERVICE THAT PARLIAMENT HOUSE CANBERRA HAS BEEN DESTROYED; SURVIVORS ARE NOT EXPECTED AS THE SITE IS NOW A 500 METRE DEEP CRATER…MORE NEWS AS IT COMES TO HAND.
Flight deck STAR BLAZER:
“Captain, Parliament house has been destroyed and the zanto’s must have DNA scanners installed, they just wiped out your dirt side residence, fortunately I beamed out the contents and put them in cargo bay 3” Ensign Lee said. “ Well they had to start limiting politicians eventually, oh and good job Gil, thanks, but these bastards are wearing my patience something chronic, captain to battle tact, I’m coming down.”
BATTLE TACT DECK 2
Captain Peter Vander-Zant entered the battle tactics HQ, and he was nowhere the joking, smiling, amiable person he had been for the last 28 months, not by a long shot. He looked over the faces in the room, Ltn’s Bornus and Lacy Dorn, 1st officer Mill Brasco, his father-in-law Colonel Myers and battle specialist Major Nathan Zubar, an earthling albeit born on Saturn, recalled from action in the Columbian cocaine wars, where he had been for a year, assisting the FBI and DEA in capturing cartel bosses, with his tactical knowledge, he had almost single handily closed down the 3 biggest cartels, and although he had assassination attempts aimed at him, the heavier gravity of Saturn had meant the most powerful handheld weapons on earth virtually bounced off him, the FBI and DEA guys thought the bosses were using too much of their own product though when they tried to tell them this. “Nat good to see you back, nice little war was it?” Enquired the captain, “ Ai sir, that it was, but this will be more taxing, those toot heads may as well have been throwing rocks.” The major smiled at his joke “ sir the colonel has been most interesting in suggesting various techniques that we can throw at these zanto goofs.” Said Zubar, “ captain, I do believe that we will have to make ourselves known to the year 2000.” Said Lacy “ because those zantorian scum have de-cloaked over Sydney harbour.” “ Bornus, weapons powered up? Asked Pete “ Ai sir, powered and ready to go, force fields at 100%, let’s kick some arse” “captain to flight deck, de-cloak us approximating the battle hawk location.” “Ai sir, proceeding” the ensign reached over to the console and began the sequence to make them visible to the 21st century.
CIRCULAR QUAY :People in the shelter set up at what use to be Circular Quay railway station looked up in disbelief when a ‘flying saucer’ appeared, it had the appearance of a flying battleship, was the general consensus, shortly there after another ship appeared, this looked like a combination between the space shuttle and the concord the two ships slowly turned so they were facing each other WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? Was the standard question dirt side? Although the people in the Reggies restaurant in George Street, weren’t asking any such questions as their world exploded around them, they didn’t even see the top of Centre point tower falling toward them, it would be said later that this was probably a good thing....